added 18.11.2011, 9:33PM

The mainstream media--particularly the TV and movie industries--like to portray casino gambling as an upscale, elegant and sophisticated experience.  That's seldom the case and particularly in the United States.  Nevada likely has the best run and most secure casinos in the country but even there you'll seldom see an undesirable given the heave-ho as long as he's betting.  In other major casino markets like Mississippi and particularly Atlantic City even the best casinos attract a much rougher crowd.  As any real tough guy knows, the best response to trouble is knowing how to prevent it before it starts.  To help you avoid in casino altercations--which are most common around the blackjack tables for some reason--here are some tips:

--Don't Goof Off At the Blackjack Table:  Everyone has been at a blackjack table with a player you just wanted to take outside and beat up.  Sometimes they're clueless noobs who don't know the rules.  Other times they're oblivious to 'house rules' and casino ettiquete like only touching your cards with one hand.  You also get your fair share of Jersey Shore wannabes who show up drunk and obnoxious.  Dealing with this type of player is easy enough--assuming you don't want to take him outside and 'teach him some manners' you can get up and leave.  More important, however, is to make sure that you don't *become* this type of vermin and incite rage from your tablemates.  It's all fun and games until you infuriate a meth addicted biker who jumps you with a tire iron in the parking lot.

--Don't Give Off 'Victim' Vibes:  I've done some time in the joint--who hasn't these days?--and as anyone who's spent time in the 'gray bar motel' will tell you that the key to avoiding trouble is carrying yourself like you mean business.  That applies in the casino as well.  While most casino patrons will ignore you there's no shortage of lowlifes who prowl casinos sizing up potential 'marks' or victims.  Don't dress like a sissy boy, and don't sulk around the room.  Dress like a tough guy and act like you own the world and you'll discourage any would be muggers, robbers and organ thieves.  

--Carry a Weapon:  To quote one of the most famous 'gamblers' of them all--Kenny Rogers: "Sometimes you have to fight when you're a man."  You never know what might happen--a young thug may be meanacing an elderly woman and you have to intervene, your broad could mouth off at a roided up musclehead or some dude could just look at you funny.  Obviously when these--or countless other--scenarios happen it's 'go time' and you don't want to be caught without a weapon.

The best option, of course, is to pack heat but depending on your criminal past and the jurisdiction you're in that may not be an option.  I never head off to the casino without a hunting knife strapped to my leg and a set of numchucks in my jacket pocket.  Once an attacker sees you pull a set of numchucks out of your jacket they know you mean business and will often run away.

If you've left for vacation without a weapon you'll need to take another page from the 'jail handbook' and make your own.  Even if you are properly equipped, there's no reason not to make a 'shank' just to be safe.  Take a toothbrush, break the brush part off and grind it on a concrete surface until it's nice and sharp (this is a good way to kill time while you're relaxing in the hot tub).  At some casinos, they do the work for you if you're creative--for example at the Rio in Las Vegas they offer a plastic utensil at the buffet to dig out crab meat.  It's also a perfect ready made shank--when the waiter gives you one slide it in your pocket and when he returns claim you dropped it or accidentially threw it away.

Danger is everywhere today and every stranger must be considered a potential threat.  The smartest way to gamble is to play blackjack online at an Internet casino.  If you insist on going out into public to a land based casino, be ready for anything.